iphonevevo:

when the person who volunteers to read is completely illiterate   

image

At least they’re brave enough to try to read in front of the class.

I’m not ticklish, you’re just grabbing my fat and I don’t like it.

The guy I’ve been dating/talking to is absolutely wonderful.  This is how I feel when he asks me to go out—

The guy I’ve been dating/talking to is absolutely wonderful.  This is how I feel when he asks me to go out—

fuckyeahloldemort:

If u like a boy just avoid him at all costs bc any kind of contact is painful and horrible its not worth it

15 Weird Questions Tag

The Questions:

#1. What’s a nickname only your family calls you? Car (“cAHr”)
#2. What’s a weird habit of yours? Chewing my lip
#3. Do you have any weird phobias? I’m scared of ducks/most birds in general
#4. What’s a song you secretly love to blast and belt out when you’re alone? “Gas Pedal” by Sage the Gemini….imagine this white girl jammin out to that song.  Please, keep your boners to yourselves.
#5. What’s one of your biggest pet peeves?  Loud chewing
#6. What’s one of your nervous habits? I make awkward faces.  Like where someone clearly knows I feel awkward.  Or I just start picking random things up and putting them down.
#7. What side of the bed do you sleep on? Right side, super close to my wall.  I line my wall with pillows so it’s like my little snuggle corner (:
#8. What was your first stuffed animal and it’s name? I have no clue…I didn’t really name my toys.
#9. What’s the drink you always order at starbucks?  I rarely go to Starbucks but on my last trip I ordered a valencia orange Starbucks Refresher and it was delicious.  Plus, the nutritional stats weren’t too shabby.  Win!
#10. What’s a beauty rule you preach, but never actually practice? Showering.
#11. Which way do you face in the shower? I spend most of the time facing away from the water.  I need to shave and let my conditioner set for a bit so…yeah
#12. Do you have any ‘weird’ body ‘skills’?  Many of my joints are able to be popped out/cracked.  my ring fingers are double jointed.  Oh and I can twerk…that’s a body skill.
#13. What’s your favorite comfort food thats ‘bad’ but you love to eat it anyways? Breaded mac & cheese…or mashed potatoes.  Ugh, I want both!
#14. What’s a phrase or exclamation you always say? “What the fuck!”
#15. Time to sleep, what are you actually wearing? That just so happens to be right now…yoga pants and a way, way, way too big t-shirt.

danfreakindavis:

timecourier:

danfreakindavis:

danfreakindavis:

someone help i just ate an entire watermelon and i just cut open a second one

update: i’m out of watermelon


make watermelon clothes



Where do I find men like this?

danfreakindavis:

timecourier:

danfreakindavis:

danfreakindavis:

someone help i just ate an entire watermelon and i just cut open a second one

update: i’m out of watermelon

make watermelon clothes

Where do I find men like this?

 - nicki minaj screaming????
107,891 plays

best-of-funny:

nickimlnaj:

theselener:

is nobody going to talk about the fact that this was in an actual nicki minaj song that she released to the public

i love this song tho

X

This is the song in my heart

This is so sexual

This is so sexual